I feel a rant coming on.

I am at present seriously annoyed.

I am a 23 year old, single, childless female. Which I guess means I'm also independantly wealthy. I just went and looked into getting a student loan so I can move out and be sane and stuff. Well, the lady that I could barely hear over the remodeling going on across the way, said that I was probably only eligible for about 3500 a year. Now, I realize 3500 dollars is 3500 dollars. However, if I were 24, married, or motherly, I'd be eligible for a lot more.

First the being 24 thing. How does being 24 make me any more or less dependant on my parents? Shouldn't the fact that I am seeking said loan so that I am no longer dependant on my parents mean something?? And why 24? There are some people whose parents kick them out the door when they turn 18, but because they are not 24, they aren't eligible for federal aid. Being 23, I still have to use my parents taxes to apply for said loan because what I make doesn't matter as much as what they make. Just because one's parents make lots and lots of money, doesn't mean one ever sees a friggin' penny of it. Ok, to be fair, my parents are very helpful and supportive, I'm just sayin'.

Second...married. Since I think my head just BURST into FLAMES I'll just say that it's so nice to have one more thing in my life hinge on my marital status. "What's that you say? You're single? Well, not only are you broken in the eyes of the society you live in, you're also broke. HA!" Forget trying to better myself before I settle on the person I'm supposedly going to share my life with. Apparently people should rush into getting married when they're only half way developed so they can afford to go school. Besides, I'm a woman, what's a woman going to do with an education anyway? Best to just bide my time until some strapping young buck comes along and graces me with a marriage proposal. You don't need a degree to be barefoot and pregnant.

Which brings me to the child thing. Do you think if I could afford a kid I would be standing in line and the financial aid office asking for money? I realize there are those that don't plan on having kids but have them anyway and go to school to provide for them which is really really great. I, however, am single and childless and am getting the financial shaft for it. Great.

The lady I'm grannysitting this week said I should get artificially inseminated. Then I could get more money and have a family and I wouldn't have to put up with those stupid men. Heh, she's so great.

Dinner for 30

I made this last night. I had to scale it up to 30 which meant five cloves of garlic and now I stink. No vampires are gonna be nibblin on me any time soon.

You may be wondering to yourself why I would be making pasta salad for 30. That's a good question. It started when this guy allegedly broke into a motor home parked in the Wal-Mart parking lot. There are lots of different stories floating around about exactly what happened, and the story changes every time it's in print, it boils down to the fact that he was shot in the head with a 12 caliber shotgun by the owner of the motor home who says he was protecting his family. Anyway the dead man's parents are in our ward and they have a lot of family in town for the funeral which is tomorrow. So, some of the women in the neighborhood are making dinner for them for tonight. My mom said she would make a salad but she's also involved with some of the funeral arrangements and feeling a little stressed, plus she's getting a cold or something, so I said I would make the salad and not to worry about it. So I made pasta salad for 30, while she went over and supervised setting up for the funeral luncheon.

This guy died the day before. I went to high school with him. He was a year younger than me. They don't know how he died, but there's speculation about an overdose, all I know is that he just didn't wake up that morning.

Not to in any way make light of the situation, or say that their deaths were a good thing, because they're not. They're tragic. But both of these men had issues which led them to early deaths. The silver lining about all of this is that it makes you, well me, realize that maybe I'm not as screwed up as I thought I was. I hope these men have finally found peace and that the families of these men will too.

Also, please ignore my appalling grammar. It's Friday.

The new digs

I've been feeling the winds of change in myself lately. I'm digging myself out of the slump I didn't know I'd been in for the last two years. About a year ago it seems I just stopped trying. I didn't much care what I looked like. I wasn't heading towards any specific goals. I was a shadow of my former self. Well, I'm sick of it. Somewhere in the last two or three years I lost track of the Katy I was. I lost track of the Katy I wanted to be. I became the Katy I am. A Katy with very little individuality. A chameleon who is different depending on who she's talking to. I don't want to be this Katy anymore. I want to be honest, strong, sassy, what you see is what you get Katy. So here I stand. At the beginning of a road where I seek to lose the Katy I have been and find the Katy I will become.

Apparently, that means I needed a prettier blog.

Not quite so boring

This weekend was a little more exciting than last weekend. Summers in Southern Utah are just destined to be dull I guess. Since the WHOLE FAMILY was out of town this weekend, it was pretty much up to me and my dad to entertain ourselves. Friday we went to Superman which was LOTS better than I thought it would be. In fact I could more than likely be convinced to go to it again. In fact, I would probably go again with no convincing whatsoever. Especially since the first time was free. Yeah, it pays to know people. I used to work at the local movie theatres and I trained a lot of the kids that are managers now, so if I can catch a nice one they let me in for free. By the end of the movie, however, I was feeling less than fantastic so I pretty much went home and went to bed where I read into the early hours of the morning.

At about 5 am Saturday morning I woke up to feeling of not goodness. By 6, I was downstairs in bad shape, so I ran myself a bath to try to relax. 6:30 I was laying on the bathroom floor between bouts of nausea and vomitting praying I wouldn't die. By 7 I was praying I would die. I actually couldn't get myself off the floor, the best I could do was crawl. When I did try to stand up I got so dizzy I fell and smacked my head on the ground. At one point in my delerium I must have started clawing at my belly to get whatever was so bad in it, out of it because I had some gnarly red scratch marks covering my lower torso. Aren't you so glad you read today? I did start feeling better around 8, not good, but good enough that I could drag my butt upstairs and go back to sleep for a couple hours. My poor dad. This is the second time it's been just me and him that I've gotten really sick. Doesn't help any when he asks what's wrong and all you can say is "Girl trouble". Those poor men must just be horrified by us sometimes. So I spent Saturday on the couch with my brothers dogs.

Sunday, pretty much the same, without the feeling like death on legs. I just took it really easy.

Monday came and I finally got off my butt. The 24th of July is when Utahn's celebrate Pioneer Day. It's basically comemorating the settling of Utah by the Momon's which means we get a day off, and there's fireworks (though there weren't last night, thunder storm). So Dad and I travelled down to St. George to try the new Thai restaurant. He wasn't impressed, but I thought it was pretty good. Of course I had never had Thai food so I had nothing to compare to. The soup was really good, I could have eaten that all day. Then we both had Pad Thai. Which was good. It wasn't what I expected, I thought there would be more flavor. It was good though, it makes me want to try really good Thai food somewhere else. Then I cleaned and did laundry and went to the store and all that stuff you're supposed to do on weekends.

OOH I also finally signed up for Netflix. Hooray! I should be getting my first movies today sometime.

Maybe it's just me...

But this may be the best idea EVER!!!!!!

Dull Dull DULL!!!!!

Yeah life is dull right now. I work all day, which is busy, but dull. Then I go home and read til it's time to go to sleep. Then I hit replay and do it all again the next day. This weekend was pretty good. I mean, good in a dull way. I did a lot. At the risk of boring you to death, here is a recap.

Friday night: Mom and Dad and I went to the Renaissance Fair and had gyros for dinner and wandered around a bit. Then I babysat three little kids that live down the street from me. Their mama cuts hair so I'm watching her kids for trade so she'll make me beaut-ee-ful. Read the kids a story, tucked them in, and spent the next two hours or so in front of the TV with the volume really low so I wouldn't wake up the kidlets.

Saturday: Woke up, went back to sleep, woke up, went back to sleep, woke up. Went downstairs and read for awhile. Then my brothers dogs came and fell asleep on me so I literally laid on the couch for three hours. I couldn't very well wake the doggies up could I? I'm so kind hearted. Then I went and got my hair cut and colored, FINALLY! It's been almost a year since I've had anything but a trim. That night I went to The Devil Wears Prada on a date with myself. Then went home and worked on a handout for church the next day for TWO HOURS that more than likely either doesn't get taken or gets thrown away as soon as they walk in the door. Grr.

Sunday I went to church (remember the dull) then I went home and made dinner. Want to know recipes?? I thought you might. I made Chicken Cordon Bleu with some changes, of course. Instead of browning the chicken before baking it I just baked it. I didn't want to add the extra greasiness. I also didn't bake the chicken in the sauce, instead I served the sauce on the side so you could have as much or as little as you wanted. Something I would suggest that I didn't do, would be to use grated swiss cheese instead of swiss cheese slices. They were a little hard to manage. Also, add about a 1/4 cup of swiss cheese to the sauce and stir until melted. The sauce was REALLY good, especially over steamed asparagus. If you don't brown the chicken before baking thought it takes WAY longer than 15 minutes. Closer to 45. I think it's just something you have to figure out for yourself. Then for dessert I made eclair cake. Oh. My. Happy. Happy. Taste Buds. This is so easy and so tasty! I didn't even tweak it. OK I tweaked a little. I used french vanilla pudding instead of plain vanilla pudding. It says it serves 14 but it's more like 7 cuz everybody's going to want seconds. Mmmmm. Seriously...go make this. Right. Now.

Anyway, dully dully dull. But at least there was food!

Look y'all!!

I write smut!!!

Where's my check??