Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Thanks! Wait...What?
I work in a department where women are vastly outnumbered by men. Well of course they're outnumbered by men. It's not like I work with 100 chihuahuas. Anyway! We women are few and far between. Most of us are in some sort of clerical position or we're in charge of cleaning, planting flowers, or pulling weeds. I have no problem whatsoever with the dynamic in my department. This isn't some sexist tirade. I like working with dozens of men, there's far less drama and I often feel like I'm surrounded by my favorite uncles. Uncles that know absolutely nothing about me.

One would think that given the male to female ratio, someone as awesome as I happen to be would have lost her single status by now. Not the case (not complaining). While it is true that men outnumber the women, it is also true that the MARRIEDS outnumber we Singles by I think it's safe to say, an even greater margin. So it's safe to assume (ass.u.me, I know) that whoever it is you're talking to, especially if they're a contract employee, is married.

Apparently this is not the case.

The players:
Kate: A super awesome Single devoted to educating young Singles that MARRIED doesn't mean better. Kate has been eyeing Tom.
Max: Tom's boss. An employee in Kate's department
Charlie: The new girl at work. (Not shown)
Tom: The cutey in question. (Not shown)

Scene: Kate is busily working away (stop laughing, I work sometimes) at her job, minding the office while everyone else is gone to lunch. Max enters stage left.

Max: Where is everybody?
Kate: Gone to lunch.
Max: Oh. Tom wanted me to ask around about Charlie.
Kate: (The blood rushing to her face) Which one's Tom? (To audience) Dammit!
Max: My apprentice, just got made a journeyman, nice kid, goatee.
Kate: Oh right! (To audience) Damn Damn Double Damn!! Ask about me!!! (To Max) What about Charlie?
Max: Is she a Single? How old is she?
Kate: I really don't know her that well. As far as I know she's single. I think she's 19 or 20.
Max: Oh. Tom's like 28 so she's probably too young for him.
Kate: Well hell Max! I'm 24!
Max: Yeah but you're a MARRIED (beat) aren't you?
Kate: (To audience) WHAT?!?!?! (To Max) No. I'm not.
Max: I thought you were married! You're just so confident and self assured!!
Kate: Well thank you. (To audience) Wait...What??
Max: (Blah blah blahs......)

People assume I'm married because I like myself? What the...? Apparently I need a sign. Maybe a scrolling marquee across my boobs, since that's where people look anyway, "Just because I like myself doesn't mean I'm married". I can't win!

It's like the big red purse story.

Whatever.

It doesn't matter.

I'm still annoyed though.


8 Comments:

Blogger Missuz J said...

I really enjoyed lunch with you today. Funny, funny girl.

Blogger lonna said...

I can't believe that anyone would assume you are married without a good reason. I don't think that confidence is exactly one's best clue. What a doofus.

Blogger NME said...

From what I've gathered Utah is quite a different land than the east coast. Here we assume anyone under the age of 30ish is unmarried. It's odd to me that it seems there people assume you gals are married once you enter your twenties.

Blogger rob said...

Wait...you're not married?

Blogger patrice said...

I thought we got married when I was out there. and here I've been planning our 1st anniversary celebration.

word verification: suxyk

Blogger Daina said...

I really have no idea where some people get such ideas. But I guess that's all part of the "joys" of Utah philosophy. Freakin idiots! ^_^ Anyhoo, maybe now that he knows you're single, he'll say something to this Tom. Who knows.

I need to call you more, I suck at communication, I know. Sorry!

Blogger Diane said...

I had a similar problem when I was at school and the women were outnumbered by men. Not that there were a lot of married people, per say, but there were a lot of people-in-relationships. So maybe there's a weird dynamic when men outnumber women and all the guys think that they can't find someone.

I personally wouldn't want to look for someone at work (I inadvertently tried that), but whatever works for you.

If you could find a scrolling marquee that you could wear on your shirt, that would be cool in a funny and risque sort of way. Maybe "those people" would get a clue.

Blogger Diane said...

Here's a great article for you to read:

Stop Singlism!

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