Wednesday, November 16, 2005
It's all in your head
So I don't know if ya'll have noticed but I've been in a fairly fabulous mood lately. I had a little change in perspective a couple weeks ago and since then, life is going, dare I say, swimmingly. I have decided that I have a lot more contorl over my attitude than I thought I did and that if I just tell people I'm having a good day and mean it then the rest will work itself out.

Take Monday for instance. There I was, walking from my comm class to my computer class thinking what a beautiful autumn day it was and feeling generally thrilled with myself and my decision to go back to school (one month from today my finals will be over!!) when WHAMMO!!! The assholio himself appeared in the crowd. I told myself, don't look Katy, just walk on by, you don't owe him the gift of your gaze. Yeah well I looked, I glanced really, barely anything, but there he was, looking back at me. All sad and I wonder if she's gonna kick me like. He smiled a little and gave me that stupid half nod "what's up" thing that boys do when they aren't going to actually talk to you. And I glared and headed to class. Then the stewing ensued. "Not even a hello? He can't even bring himself to actually SAY Hi Katy. What a ginormous loser." This little encounter would have ruined my day a few weeks ago. I would have been reduced to an angry tearful pile of pity party. But not today, no no! I recovered nicely and adjusted quickly and resolved that something must be done about this before it drives me crazier. So I sat down and I wrote him a letter. I was able to get out all that I wanted to say and put my own thoughts in order. I may never actually give him said letter, but the fact that it's out there now, that I've finally established why I'm really so angry feels great! This being in charge of myself and my emotions thing is really great.

Todays thing I learned: Well, apparently I'm learning something because I got well above average on my bio test! WOO HOO Go Katy!!!


Blogger rob said...

Atta girl.

This isn't exactly on subject, but I feel the need to share it regardless: From experience, I have found that nothing sticks it in and breaks if off for a heartbreaker more than moving on without them. By this I mean, if you show that you're past the history between you two and are actually happy without him, his knickers will twist so tight it'll Epi-dude* his short and curlies.

The next time you see him, don't give him the pleasure of knowing that his presence affects you. If you don't glare, if you don't smile, if all you do is lob at him one of his own disinterested, bobbleheaded 'what up' nods, I'll bet you coitus to colostomy bags that he'll deflate...Hindenberg style.

*Mad propers to anyone who remembers the Epilady.

Blogger NME said...

I know for myself that the best way to get out of a crap mood is to decide I'm in a better mood and make it so. You are in total control.

Blogger patrice said...

good for you, katy!!!

Blogger amandak said...

Yay for being in charge of your own emotions!!!

You're getting to be such a big girl. ;)

No, really, that's a great thing to learn, and some people just never do. Good on ya.

Love you tons, can't wait to see you!!

Blogger Jazz said...

Wow, I so know how you felt and it was great how you reacted! I am still afraid to meet the guy I am actually over because I am afraid I will get these feelings again and I DON'T WANT TO. So I hope I'm gonna be strong enough to be politely but cool.
Your post gave me hope to make it!!

Greetz from Germany ~

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